always.

Monday, June 28, 2004

-i miss my frens.love katharine.jillian.frances.siuyuin.alicis.steph.

zhenj.rudith.flea.siank.and my gfs.schmuakz.

-i hate pple who think highly of emself.speak in the blardi im-the-best and as-a-matter-of-fact tone.

-i hate that im affected by things ard me badly.

-y are my problems piling up at this time?

-i wan the inner me to be at peace..

-i need some sleep.im exhausted.

-btw $$ is the root of all evil.its true.

Friday, June 25, 2004

i hate changes.

i hate choices.

i hate it when i make a choice and my choice doesnt offer it.

i hate decisions.

i hate going to flinders uni.

i hate everything.

i hate the i-have-to-do-it-even-thou-i-fuckin-dun-want-to- stuff.and the reason is its-for-ya-own-good.these for ya own good depresses pple.

i hate pple who judge pple.

i feel like fuck.

just leave me alone.

im gonna be a loner at uni.

Tuesday, June 22, 2004

alright this is official.im a pig.haha been pigging out yday and today.ydae woke up real early to go down to adelaide to check my eyesight.with mummy.the pple at the store looked alil unfriendly but at least the guy that did the eye checking for me was gd.turns out i didnt increase in degree which is gd.hehe.so mum siad since my degree is ok den no need make new specs.only when we were having breakfast i realise my spare specs degree is v off alr.hehe so going to make my specs when mum goes to collect her specs.saw this black plastic one that was nice.hehe eyeing that one.alright then we headed to aunty susie place to check oout my room and all.kinda like it.cosy and got my own privacy and all.so yea went for lunch at mt barker where ihad chicken snitxel with pepper sauce and then ordered dessert.choc mud cake with ice cream.nice!hee.the fudge ard it was heavenly.yum.after lunch helped mum cleaned this house and then dinner and off to the childcare for cleaning.was kinda exhausted after the whole day.

woke up at 12plus today.(see im a zzz in piggy) and mum said go to victor harbor to pick up jenette bike from the bike shop.ate seafood w chips.scallop n all.hmm nice but ex.haha i feel so full nw..hmm im a tv addict!going to watch tv.lala..

planning to go back spore end yr.1mth or 3mths?diff in air tix is quite a sum thou.hmm at least one 1mth can spend xmas n new yr in spore.nice.whee**

loving this song..

The Reason
by Hoobastank

I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you

I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
That's why I need you to hear

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you
And the reason is you
And the reason is you
And the reason is you

I'm not a perfect person
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you

I've found a reason to show
A side of me you didn't know
A reason for all that I do
And the reason is you

Sunday, June 20, 2004

How to make a desireee

Ingredients:

3 parts friendliness

1 part silliness

5 parts ego

Method:
Combine in a tall glass half filled with crushed ice. Top it off with a sprinkle of emotion and enjoy!

Personality cocktail
From Go-Quiz.com

got this from flea's blog.neat*

D	Dashing
E	Earthy
S	Spunky
I	Industrious
R	Rich
E	Enchanting
E	Energetic

Name Acronym Generator
From Go-Quiz.com

and got this from the site..nice!

i hope hols past real quick.sch starts and the sem passes by ultra quick.four mths gone and spore here i come!i wanna cut my hair.i want a fringe but i haven had a fringe in yrs.haha

Thursday, June 17, 2004

back online again.shows how bored i am.newaes back from watching shrek2.and shrek2 gets drum rolls* 5outof5 popcorns! its soooooo nice.puss in boots is adorable.pinochio is utterly hilarious w the ahem* thong.grin.gee i just love it.haha

well got the offer letter from unisa alr.online.somehow i wasnt expecting it thru email.i mean when i filled up the form they said indicate where u wan the offer letter to be sent.home country or aust.if they send by email den wads the diff?gee.this uni stuff is complicated.headache*

o and i added back the forest gump song.just seem to still like it.hehe

im bored.gee.i woke up at 11am and den washed the clothes.cleaned the car.packed my room.gonna watch shrek2 tonite.im soo excited!!

added nicholas to links.hehe

oops gotta ciao.picking up the kids.

Wednesday, June 16, 2004

new skin!!like it or hate it?proud dat i did some changes myself and it worked out.hehe

new links..my sis jenette.helped her with it and it looks pretty kewl*

woke up reall early and headed off to the airport to sent debbie off.really miss her.but i knew this day had to come.shes really happy to go back.and me im gonna study at uni sa i guess.hope debbie comes back in feb to study.guess the two of us have been thru alot.rem i used to beg my aunt to let deb stay over at my hse when we were in pri5.she would stay for the weekend.sometimes i stay at my ahma hse in potong pasir and e would explore it.she will then tell me who this girl is.who dat guy is.from her sch blah blah blah.we would think eating takeaway laksa at home and watching tv was such a thrill..going to the mama shop to buy bee bee for 10cents each.den she came to stay at my hse since sec1 to the end of her sec sch life.seen me cry god-knows-how-many time.in everything.when i got scolding,ended a relationship.fear of grades.we helped each other in everything.made noise like no ones business.gave advice on relationships,friends,clothes.helped in sch work and all.hey debbie i do miss you.have fun in spore while you can and come back yea?

suddenly my room feels so big and here i am all alone.gee.

btw katharine dont pull out of sch.i feel that u shld take ya a's next yr because even if u pull out sooner or later u still have to seek ya tertiary education and go thru all these stress again.i noe hw it feels to be totally stressed out.the only thing on my mind these months is nothing but stress and problems.but it is with stress dat makes us strive to do well.without it there is no motivation to be determined to excel.always works for me.even if u take ya alevels and ya behind pple.dats alright.different people have their own pace to take.just go at what is comfortable for you.its better late than never.i always kept in mind what my ex-principal sr anne said?'its not where you begin that is important,but where you end'.i always felt that i could nv accomplish something in the beginning.but in the end things nv turn out the way i thot it would be.so think carefully and go for the alevels k?talk to randall,ya family.they are there for u to talk to.see how it turns out?like my mum said.struggle for a few yrs,get a gd degree and enjoy the rest of ya life ahead without regrets.love ya girl.hope this helps.anythng just sms/email/tag me k?hugg*

Tuesday, June 15, 2004

finally uploaded some pics.hehe.click at the side or just click
here &
here.pics of jamie at our house and us at the rocking horse.in april i think.finally found time to upload em on dotphoto.but it always seem like ages to upload em.haha

ate macs happy meal!debbie treated us.the happy meal toy is the care bear plush!its sooo kewt.haha.i think i have the bigger toy somewhere..hmm.

Monday, June 14, 2004

went to watch harry potter today!!

caught the 12.30pm slot at marion megaplex.the whole shopping mall was deserted cept for pple at the cinema.btw today is the queen's birthday therefore its a public holiday.BUT by right it isnt the queen;s bday.so why is today the queen's bday?dun ask me.newaes i was hyper and all excited bout it.haaha overall i give harry potter & the prisoner of azkaban 4 out of 5 popcorns.hehe well it didnt get 5popcorns because i felt the movie was very summarized?as in alot of things were missing.like siruis black entering the gryfinddor tower to ron to get scabbers.and the fireblot was sent at the end??its suppose to be sent in the middle!then hermione gets prog mcgonagall to check it for jinxes.and harry n ron is suppose to be mad at her blah blah.and!!!at the end harry is suppose to get the consent form signed by siruis black his godfather for permission to go to hogmeade!!which they didnt flimed.so how is harry gonna go to hogmeade?gee.

ooo and i think fred and george weasley are sooooo kewt!!haha their hair looks kinda beng-ish thou.but nv the less.kewt.blush*
the harry,ron and hermione have grown to be so kewt and pretty..but it is gd thou.i still love it.haha

watching shrek2 on thurs!!hehe

today was sucha cold day.after the movie deb went too cut her air tix and then we headed to glenelg plannin on having a picnice w mum but it turned out to be so cold and so we decided to eat in the car.which was great cuz moments after we ate den it rained heavily.and den we came home to corio hotel to have dinner.had butterfish.this equates to im full and fat.gee.haha i love today*

my left eye hurts.cant rub it.it feels blue-black.haha deb said im too heaty..hmm

You're My Little Pony!! Sweet and innocent and
happy, you make people want to spew burrito
chunks. Even a Care Bear could kick your ass.

What childhood toy from the 80s are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

i lurve my little pony!i really do!got some figurines of em and i used to read the storybooks.hehe

cho

You're chocolate. You're the old soul type, people
feel that they have known you their entire
life. Many often open up to you for they view
you as thoughtful and trustworthy. Although
people trust you, you have a hard time trusting
them. You prefer to keep your feelings bottled
up inside, or display them very quietly. It is
alright to open up every once in a while.

Which kind of candy are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Sunday, June 13, 2004

i want a mp3 player!!haha..the materialistic side of me.but it would be so handy to have one.save money on cds.haha thou i seldom buy alr.hardly.its much lighter than a discman also.planning on getting one dat is 256mb.store more songs.so when i stay in the city when studying uni i can listen on the way home.i think sitting on the bus and staring at nothing is really boring..bad enuff in spore.but aust is even worse.cuz the buses really suck.but a gd brand mp3 player is so ex.eg:sony,creative.terrible..only can save..sigh.birthday isnt near..phats.

gonna watch harry potter tmr!!wad else can i say.im so happy that even though i had a whole day of scrubing at the childcare and vacuumming at home im still ok with it.just as long as i watch harry potter!and sherk2 on thurs.haha a wonderful week i hope.

was talking to darren dearie ydae.haha all of a suddenly we were talking bt bf and gf.and i came to the conclusion i like guys that are the 'inbetweens'.haha we settled on 'inbetween' sincec the rest did sound duh.haha up for the nominations were wild er smth.i cant rem.haha geez.and i came up with 'havoc goody2shoes'haha u sorta get the idea of wad i look for in a guy.jillian does this ring a bell?i was thinking when do u noe that u like a guy?i really am not sure.but i noe if i am into a guy and he called me or smth and i didnt ans.i cld just regret not picking up the fone cuz i so wanna talk to him?haha i think i used to be like dis last time.blush*but newaes i haven gotten this feeling in YEARS.haha staying single is great and im loving it?so macs.being in a relationship is gd but maybe not nw for me.i stil wanna wait for my prince charming..sigh*maybe when im back in spore.daydreams*haha..o gosh..

oo i fell ydae over the door ledge..geez.feel so goofed.haha my palm hurts,got bruises on my foot and my BOTH kneecaps or rather near the kneecaps have bruises.thankfully i was wearing jeans so i didnt graze anywhere.haha.

* dear girlfriends my hp has no $ therefore if u msg me and i dun reply its nt cuz i dun want to.its cuz i cant!haha me?not reply a sms from u girls?never!hehe i love u all.each and everyone of u.hugg.

some quizzes..
you have... mild depression

Pbb(0x88d4fec)

What type of Depression do you have? (MANY different outcomes)
brought to you by Quizilla

oic..im understanding myself more each day.

Saturday, June 12, 2004

True Blue ~ An IJ Arts Fest

On July 3 and 4, the eleven IJ schools will come
together at Chijmes for
True Blue ~ An IJ Arts Fest, The weekend will
feature dance, music and
other performances by students from the IJ
schools and members of the IJ
Homes & Centres. We will be posting a schedule
of the events as well as
ticketing details on our website in early June. -

http://www.chij150.com -

Also on the program is Confessions of Two Ex-
CONS. In what promises to be
a hilarious look back on Convent life, Koh
Chieng
Mun (Under One Roof,
Living With Lydia) and Irene Ang (Phua Chu Kang
Pte. Ltd.) take a walk down
memory lane and reveal all their deep dark
secrets from their days in the
Convent (Victoria Street & Kellock
respectively). Cheing Mun and Irene
invite you to share your own confessions with
them, or to tell any memories
you may have, or even make a Top Ten list (Top
Ten excuses to get out of
PE?). They would love to hear from everyone
with
a Convent story to tell.
Visit http://stories.chij150.com

Other highlights include a Bazaar where you will
find various handicrafts
and IJ memorabilia, and Guided Tours of Chijmes
conducted by nuns and
former students of Victoria Street, as well as
the release of a First Day
Cover featuring CHIJ by Singapore Post.

Please spread the word around to all the CHIJ
girls
you know, and help us
make this year a truly special one for the IJ
community!

i wanna go!!sounds like so much fun..geez.still rem when we were sec 2 and we had 145th anni.hehe

i hate psychos.u r such a psycho.u noe dat?

jamie left for melbourne alr.guess she shld be there now.i miss her really.we had our dumb ass-es moments and we had our fun times.love ya girl!

Wednesday, June 09, 2004

email from siank.short yet simple.

perspective

One day a father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the firm purpose of showing his son how poor people live.They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family. On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, "How was the trip?" "It was great, Dad." "Did you see how poor people live?" the father asked."Oh yeah," said the son. "So, tell me, what did you learn from the trip?" asked the father. The son answered: "I saw that we have one dog and they had four. We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has no end. We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night. Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon. We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight. We have servants who serve us, but they serve others. We buy our food, but they grow theirs.We have walls around our property to protect us, they have friends to protect them." The boy's father was speechless. Then his son added, "Thanks, Dad, for showing me how poor we are." Isn't perspective a wonderful thing? Makes you wonder what would happen if we all gave thanks for everything we have, instead of worrying about what we don't have. Appreciate every single thing you have, especially your friends! Life is too short and friends are too few.

desireee hates dentist.argh.unisa or james cook uni?decisions decisions.omg.

Tuesday, June 08, 2004

hello im back with a better mood i guess.yea.wad are we gonna do without the internet.imagine no internet.i mean its gonna mean not keeping in touch with my friends??and meeting my old friends.found a friend from pri sch.aileen lim!!and i was just thinking which part of the world is she in and shes in aust?haha how kewl.sigh.i miss pri sch*newaes im so hyper over harry potter!!!cant wait!!grinz.and deb is prob going back next week.jamie is leaving for melbourne this week.its funny how i nv felt like this before.im gonna be alone from next week till uni starts on 26july??i mean its aother studying phase of my life.such a big step.wow.was supposed to go back this june but i decided not to.well not really i decided not to.with my circumstances i cant.and its the best i can do.sheesh.making me feel better is just another 4mths when sch starts and i go back to spore?so i hope time flies..yes fly as fast as u can time.so to entertain myself this two mths.i borrowed the whole series of harry potter to read from the library.i so badly want the books myself.saving up to buy em.i just feel its such a gd series.all hail J.K.Rowling.hee.and yea mum wants me to learn manual driving.such a waste of time but yet essential.y on earth did she make us learn auto in the first place.shrugs*so yea im gonna go back in end of nov.my bday!!whee!!siuyuin this means we can go to loners rock.haha.wow im so excited.hmm funny how i do miss eynesbury.i nv felt i would seriously speaking.an i nv thot that i would form bonds with pple in sch.as in close friends..eynesbury to me was just a sch dat enabled me to go to uni.but now i am alil sad dat im leaving sch.going to sch after law exam the next day felt different for me.it was like going to just a building.weird*newaes i love my friends.wad is this world without friends.how can anyhow not have friends.having the world's riches is of no use.compared to one who is so rich with friendship.and on this note i thank YOU.yup You.the one reading this for being my friend.ilu!*

o before i forget..during the duration that jamie was here we had heaps of fun.haha jamie just cracks me up.and we have funny names like lou sai,muimui and sunny.well inside joke.hehe we just baked cookies.and before that we baked mud cake.hey jamie girl im gonna miss u when u go to melbourne.but nvm we have free call right?and no one bullys my mui mui.hehe sup?watched land before time and im so inlove with the show.and also the show.just reminds me of ij.ive got so many songs that im in love with man.so ok lemme put the song lyrics of the songs i love nw.whee*

If We Hold On Together
by Diana Ross
ps:need i say anymore on why i love this song?

Don't lose your way
With each passing day
You've come so far
Don't throw it away
Live believing
Dreams are for weaving
Wonders are waiting to start
Live your story
Faith hope and glory
Hold to the truth
In your heart

If we hold on together
I know our dreams
Will never die
Dreams see us through
To forever
Where clouds roll by
For you and I

Souls in the winds
must learn how to mend
Seek out a star
Hold on to the end
Valley, mountain
There is a fountain
Washes our tears
All away
Words are swaying
Someone is praying
Please let us come
Home to stay

If we hold on together
I know our dreams
Will never die
Dreams see us through
To forever
Where clouds roll by
For you and I

When we are out there
In the dark
We'll dream about the sun
In the dark
We'll feel the light
Warm our hearts
Everyone

If we hold on together
I know our dreams
Will never die
Dreams see us through
To forever
As high
As souls can fly
The clouds roll by
For you and I

Burn
by Usher

ps:superb song.nuff' said
I don't understand why
See it's burning me to hold onto this
I know this is something I gotta do
But that don't mean I want to
What I'm trying to say is that I-love-you I just
I feel like this is coming to an end
And its better for me to
Let it go now than hold on and hurt you
I gotta let it burn

[Verse 1]
It's gonna burn for me to say this
But it's comin from my heart
It's been a long time coming
But we done been fell apart
Really wanna work this out
But I don't think you're gonna change
I do but you don't
Think it's best we go our separate ways
Tell me why I should stay in this relationship
When I'm hurting baby, I ain't happy baby
Plus there's so many other things I gotta deal with
I think that you should let it burn

[Chorus]
When your feeling ain't the same and your body don't want to
But you know gotta let it go cuz the party ain't jumpin' like it used to
Even though this might bruise you
Let it burn
Let it burn
Gotta let it burn

Deep down you know it's best for yourself but you
Hate the thought of her being with someone else
But you know that it's over
We knew it been through
Let it burn
Let it burn
Gotta let it burn

Sendin' pages I ain't supposed to
Got somebody here but I want you
Cause the feelin ain't the same find myself
Callin' her your name
Ladies tell me do you understand?
Now all my fellas do you feel my pain?
It's the way I feel
I know I made a mistake
Now it's too late
I know she ain't comin back
What I gotta do now
To get my shorty back
Ooo ooo ooo ooooh
Man I don't know what I'm gonna do
Without my booo
You've been gone for too long
It's been fifty-leven days, um-teen hours
Imma be burnin' till you return (let it burn)

[Chorus]

I'm twisted cuz one side of me is tellin' me
that I need to move on
On the other side I wanna break down
and cry (ooooh)
I'm twisted cuz one side of me is tellin' me
that I need to move on
On the other side I wanna break down and cry (yeah)

Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh oooh
Ooh ooh oooh (can ya feel me burnin'?)
Ooh ooh ooh oooh ooh oooh

So many days, so many hours
I'm still burnin' till you return

[Chorus]

Suga Suga (Feat. Frankie J)
by Baby Bash
ps:i just like the tune of this?really nice..
BABY BASH

"Suga Suga (Feat. Frankie J)"

So tight, so fly
You got me lifted, you got me lifted

[Frankie J.]
You got me lifted shifted higher than a ceiling
And ooh wee it’s the ultimate feeling
You got me lifted feeling so gifted
Suga how you get so fly?
Suga suga how you get so fly?
Suga suga how you get so fly?
Suga suga how you get so fly?
Suga suga how you get so fly?

[Baby Bash]
You know its leather when we ride
Wood grain and raw hide
Doing what we do, watching screens getting high
Girl you keep it so fly with your sweet honey buns
You was there when the money was gone
You’ll be there when the money comes
Off top I can’t lie I love to get blowed
You my lil’ sugar, I’m yo little chulo
And every time we kick it it’s off to the groovy
Treat you like my sticky-ickey or my sweet oowey goowey (for real though)

[Frankie J.]
You got me lifted shifted higher than a ceiling
And ooh wee it’s the ultimate feeling
You got me lifted feeling so gifted
Suga how you get so fly?
Suga suga how you get so fly?
Suga suga how you get so fly?
Suga suga how you get so fly?
Suga suga how you get so fly?

[Baby Bash]
Now I ain’t worried about a thang cuz I just hit me a lick
I got a fat sack and a superfly chick
(And uh-uh) And there ain't nothin' you can say to a playa
Cuz doo-wop, she fly like the planes in the air
That’s right she’s full grown settin’ the wrong tone
I’m diggin’ the energy and I’m lovin’ the ozone
So fly like a dove so fly like a raven
Quick to politic with some fly conversation
In a natural mood then I’m a natural dude
And we some natural fools blowin’ out by the pool
She like my sexy cool mama with blades on her berata
Rockin’ dolce gabbana with hydro in a gupana

[Frankie J.]
You got me lifted shifted higher than a ceiling
And ooh wee it’s the ultimate feeling
You got me lifted feeling so gifted
Suga how you get so fly?
Suga suga how you get so fly?
Suga suga how you get so fly?
Suga suga how you get so fly?
Suga suga how you get so fly?

[Bridge]
You know its leather when we ride
Wood grain and raw hide
Doing what we do, watching screens getting high
Girl you keep it so fly with you sweet honey buns
You was there when the money was gone
You’ll be there when the money comes

You know its leather when we ride
Wood grain and raw hide
Doing what we do, watching screens getting high
Girl you keep it so fly with you sweet honey buns
You was there when the money was gone
You’ll be there when the money comes (for real though)

[Frankie J.]
You got me lifted shifted higher than a ceiling
And ooh wee it’s the ultimate feeling
You got me lifted feeling so gifted
Suga how you get so fly?
Suga suga how you get so fly?
Suga suga how you get so fly?
Suga suga how you get so fly?
Suga suga how you get so fly?

So high like I’m a star
Feelin’ so high like I’m a star
Feelin’ so high like I’m a star
Feelin’ so high like I’m a star

This is said in a whisper: Asucar (in spanish sugar)

Saturday, June 05, 2004

my future seems bleak

blogging again..i wanna go home to spore..sob.this uni is driving me crazy.fuck.

im sorry i just needed to let it out.newaes booboo kor..
after reading ya blog i guess ya heart is finally letting u go of all ya pain.its weird but u do feel better right?dun feel guilty if u think how come ya letting her go.its alright.it was a stage dat u were in for v long but finally ya at the passing stage of that.im really happy for u.hugg.

trying to console pple when i cant even control myself.i wonder how pple can cry till they get puffy eyes..at the rate i have cried i still dun get puffy eyes.pple always say crying makes you feel better..sometimes it doesnt.u noe that even when you are done with crying the problem is still there.so why cry?because u cant control ya tears and emotions.crying doesnt make u feel better but it is something u can do.crying to slp is a gd way to go to slp..though the pillow gets all wet but heck it.pray my tear duct doesnt spoil..

got back law exam results.passed..57.gd enuff for me.

theres just no vibe in me now.im so dead.like a walking skeleton..pls god help me..let everything go away pls..

Friday, June 04, 2004

exams are over..notice how i dont sound excited?in stead of going EXAMS ARE OVER!!?well cuz dere isnt anything to be happy abt.i noe i sound sadist.but forgive me cuz im in a position dat none of you would want to be in.hopefully my tear glands dont overwork making my eyes hurt so badly.hopefully things work out.i hate it when everything is at a halt..got BIS exam results.82/100.distinction.3marks more n a high dist.see how neutral i am w my results..

does love make the world go round?think abt it..look with ya eyes.